Oprah used to have some street-fight in her, but I think that is a couple decades gone. Martha's a bitch, but I think actual fighting would be left up to minions. Jesus is a lover, not a fighter. You merely need to be rolled in wheat flour and you're done for.
I don't understand why I'm the only afraid of the wrath of Jesus. Implicit in the question is that he exists, so if he does - all the others may make one uncomfortable for some finite period of time, but only Jesus can doom you to eternal misery.
If Jesus and the devil both exist, I'm WAY more afraid of Jesus.
Nothing is implicit in the question. Yags uses fictional people all the time.
But for intelligent people it takes a willing suspension of disbelief to think of Harry Potter and Optimus Prime. This stretching of reality only goes so far however, and certainly not far enough to encompass the jesus shite.
Well, in terms of the question's scope, we must accept that all the possible responses are "real". Otherwise, since Yags includes himself in every response, he would be the only valid choice in nearly all the questions.
Since we accept that, within the scope of the question - all the choices are "real" and that they have all the powers ascribed to them; then Jesus is, for the purposes of this question, the Son of God, and through him and only through him can you escape eternal torment. If we accepted the choices as "real" and didn't accept the reality of all the powers ascribed to them, the poll would be a confused mess. By "Harry Potter" do we mean an orphan who goes to a weird school but has no powers? By "Optimus Prime" do we mean a truck that turns into a robot, but isn't self-willed and not the leader of a society of similar beings? By "Jesus" do we mean a Jewish revolutionary with delusions of grandeur?
I give credit to Yags for having the common sense to make his question as easy as possible. When he puts the Easter Bunny as a possible response, implicit in the premise is "Assuming the Easter Bunny really exists".
Wait... you can stretch your imagination around a sentient truck that transforms into a massive war-robot or a kid who can summon magical powers with a stick and some Latin-esque phrases... but can't stretch it around deities or their opposite?
I can understand having a personal dislike of religion, or even being vehemently opposed to the concept of deities. I can see how a modern, rational person of healthy skepticism can adhere to a firm belief in a secular universe. I can even see rationality becoming almost dogmatic in the face of world that contains religious fundamentalists of every ilk.
I can't understand why a rational person, who I know has an healthy and active imagination, being able to put those things aside for the sake of a funny little word game where everyone tries to come up with the best arguments why one fictional/literary/celebrity personality would win in a barfight with another.
I think we ALL assume what folks presuppose. It's part of communications that a common language and meaning be inferred in everything we say. I choose to assume my friend Yags is making a funny statement about the popularity of Oprah and Martha when he puts them in the same league with Jesus and Beelzebub. I presume, because he's been doing this for a looooong time, that every one of the WWWIAF questions is designed with entertainment in mind, despite any mention of deities. If an when Yags decides to change that and take a soapbox for any of the personalities mentioned I'll revisit my assumption.
Pope Yagathai, First Scion of the Church of Oprah... I like this.
But.... Jesus is my personal Savior. He wouldn't do that to me! And, since I'm in good with Jesus, I don't have to sweat the Devil. See how that works?
The question is, who would win in a fight? Jesus is a known pacifist.
Well, "historically", Jesus and the devil have fought (Jesus won) and then again after Jesus died (Jesus won) and will again, come the Revalation. (JC goes three for three.)
The real question is - what happens when Jesus and Oprah rumble?
The only time he ever got angry, I think he knocked over some vendor tables in a temple or something, didn't he? And then, being Jesus, he probably forgave them right after.
I think you're thinking of his dad, the guy that turned a woman into a pillar of salt because she looked back as she was running from the burning city where she'd lived all her life, the one she was forced to flee after he graciously allowed her to live because her husband offered up their two virgin daughters to be raped by an angry mob or something...
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timeasmymeasure
no subject
Date: 2009-06-30 03:31 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2009-06-30 03:45 pm (UTC)But in the end it's Oprah's world and we just live in it.
Get on her bad side and she'll shank you.
Date: 2009-06-30 04:28 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2009-06-30 07:15 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2009-06-30 04:34 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2009-06-30 04:50 pm (UTC)If Jesus and the devil both exist, I'm WAY more afraid of Jesus.
no subject
Date: 2009-06-30 05:35 pm (UTC)But for intelligent people it takes a willing suspension of disbelief to think of Harry Potter and Optimus Prime. This stretching of reality only goes so far however, and certainly not far enough to encompass the jesus shite.
no subject
Date: 2009-06-30 05:40 pm (UTC)Since we accept that, within the scope of the question - all the choices are "real" and that they have all the powers ascribed to them; then Jesus is, for the purposes of this question, the Son of God, and through him and only through him can you escape eternal torment. If we accepted the choices as "real" and didn't accept the reality of all the powers ascribed to them, the poll would be a confused mess. By "Harry Potter" do we mean an orphan who goes to a weird school but has no powers? By "Optimus Prime" do we mean a truck that turns into a robot, but isn't self-willed and not the leader of a society of similar beings? By "Jesus" do we mean a Jewish revolutionary with delusions of grandeur?
I give credit to Yags for having the common sense to make his question as easy as possible. When he puts the Easter Bunny as a possible response, implicit in the premise is "Assuming the Easter Bunny really exists".
no subject
Date: 2009-06-30 05:46 pm (UTC)I'll say it again, it's too far fetched for rational humans, hence it was dismissed out of hand.
By all the rational humans.
no subject
Date: 2009-06-30 05:48 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2009-06-30 06:27 pm (UTC)I can understand having a personal dislike of religion, or even being vehemently opposed to the concept of deities. I can see how a modern, rational person of healthy skepticism can adhere to a firm belief in a secular universe. I can even see rationality becoming almost dogmatic in the face of world that contains religious fundamentalists of every ilk.
I can't understand why a rational person, who I know has an healthy and active imagination, being able to put those things aside for the sake of a funny little word game where everyone tries to come up with the best arguments why one fictional/literary/celebrity personality would win in a barfight with another.
I think we ALL assume what folks presuppose. It's part of communications that a common language and meaning be inferred in everything we say. I choose to assume my friend Yags is making a funny statement about the popularity of Oprah and Martha when he puts them in the same league with Jesus and Beelzebub. I presume, because he's been doing this for a looooong time, that every one of the WWWIAF questions is designed with entertainment in mind, despite any mention of deities. If an when Yags decides to change that and take a soapbox for any of the personalities mentioned I'll revisit my assumption.
Pope Yagathai, First Scion of the Church of Oprah... I like this.
no subject
Date: 2009-06-30 08:19 pm (UTC)The question is, who would win in a fight? Jesus is a known pacifist.
no subject
Date: 2009-06-30 09:06 pm (UTC)The real question is - what happens when Jesus and Oprah rumble?
no subject
Date: 2009-06-30 09:05 pm (UTC)I think you're thinking of his dad, the guy that turned a woman into a pillar of salt because she looked back as she was running from the burning city where she'd lived all her life, the one she was forced to flee after he graciously allowed her to live because her husband offered up their two virgin daughters to be raped by an angry mob or something...
Yeah, that's the dude I want to keep happy.
no subject
Date: 2009-06-30 09:08 pm (UTC)CorpsTrinity.no subject
Date: 2009-06-30 09:37 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2009-06-30 07:43 pm (UTC)The Belly of the Beast wasn't shit for Martha.
She lives by Rikers Law: Snitches Get Stitches.
no subject
Date: 2009-06-30 09:27 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2009-07-01 04:43 am (UTC)